Lord of the land ( Tudi Gong )土地公

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M=Mom  S=Son
S：Mom, come and get me!
M：Darling, where are you
S：Here, Mom!
M：Oh, darling, it's impolite to hide yourself in the shine to Tudi Gong!
S：What  Tudi Gong
M：Tudi Gong is the official title of a member of the spiritual administration parallel to that of the emperor's government on earth. He is one of the oldest and still one of the most widely worshiped deities in Taiwan. Get out of there now!
S：OK. I thought this shrine is for kids to play in. Besides, the statue of Tudi Gong appears as a mild-faced, kindly elder with a long while beard, round cap and clothing gentleman.
M：Yes, moreover, he holds a long walking stick or a jade scepter in his right hand, and a gold ingot in his left one.
S：Mom, then what's that crouching beneath
M：It's Lord Tiger, obeying Tudi Gong's commands.
S：Then what's Tudi Gong's main task
M：To look after the piece of land he governs.
S：I see. Mom, can I change my bedroom into this style just like Tudi Gong's shrine
M：Why
S：Then I don't have to have dinner in the dining room, but you'll send food and drinks to me as you do to Tudi Gong.
M：No, problem. But keep this in your mind. I only worship Tudi Gong twice a month.

兒子：媽，來找我。
媽媽：親愛的，你在哪裡？
兒子：這裡，媽！
媽媽：親愛的，躲在土地公廟裡真是大不敬啊！
兒子：什麼土地公？
媽媽：土地公就是管理土地的神，像是地方官一樣。在台灣祂是最古老也是最普遍的神祇之一。快滾出來！
兒子：好吧。我以為這個小廟是可以讓小孩玩的，而且土地公的神像看起來很溫和，像個仁慈的長者，留著長鬍子，戴方帽，穿得像士紳的樣子。
媽媽：沒錯，而且祂右手還拿了根拐杖或如意，左手則拿金元寶。
兒子：老媽，下面趴著的是什麼？
媽媽：喔，是虎爺，專聽土地公的命令。
兒子：那土地公的工作呢？
媽媽：就是要掌管祂的管區。
兒子：了解了，媽，我可以把我的臥室改成土地公廟的樣子嗎？
媽媽：為什麼？
兒子：這樣，我就不用到飯廳吃飯了，您會把飯和飲料送到我房間來，就像您拜土地公一樣。
媽媽：可以啊，可是我一個月只拜土地公二次喔。

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